He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
