The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Randomize
