i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
