They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
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Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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