The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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