I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
