ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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