ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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