It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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