Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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