Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize