Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize