youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
