why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
