Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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