She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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