You really coming over, don't trick.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
