? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.