Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize