I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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