he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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