are you still at the devil's house?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
