Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
