It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I have fence marks all over my body
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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