Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
