Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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