my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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