you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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