i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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