you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
