please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
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She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
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Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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