So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
