um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
