and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
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