I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering