belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
