Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
