Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
