so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
