you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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