My friends, they love my intelligence
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Come back. Shots need mouths.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
