1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
