We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I want a musical about memes.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
