You work out of a Hotel?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
