WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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