You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
