so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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