Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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