did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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