it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
