first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
It's just like the Real World with babies
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Randomize
