i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Randomize
