I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
